Who ever comes up with this manual will be a billionaire and a genius in my eyes.
Life is so tricky...so many twists, turns, heartaches, vibrant experiences. I would NEVER in a million years give up one experience in my life regardless how tough it was. Yes, terrible things happened to me when I was younger. People were mean, an abusive past, things didn't work out as planned, But, it has made me into the Strong, Loving woman I am.
You receive the standard advice from friends, loved ones and even strangers. Each and everyone is like a little Angel on your shoulder. Willing to share their life's lessons and help people avoid such heartache and loss. Sure some people want to brush that sweet angel away and say It just won’t happen to them. I on the other hand strongly believe that things happen for a reason. I'd love to just sit down one day and write my life story and hope that it will help the next person walking towards the same goals in their life.
I know I'm given only what I'm able to handle as some wonderful person said to me at my younger years. That has helped me struggle through all those tough times in my life. Yeah it may seem like you are swimming in a deep dark despairing sea, but if you point your head in the right direction and fight for all it's worth, You will break free. May seem like it will never happen and it wont, especially if you keep that attitude. If you believe in yourself and that you can and will get out, You are the only one who can make the difference between surviving or just plain giving up.
Life is tough but I feel Love can be tougher and yes even more Puzzling. You know that sweet childhood game with the beautiful flower you pick dreaming of your young crush...does he love me...does he love me not?!?! Well, I do and I have decided it should be Do I love him, Do I love him not?!?!? Marriage is a tough battle and it seems now a days people are more apt to just give up the fight early on to search for greener pastures. Well, I for one can not delve into this topic as I am still newly married and struggling every day with my inner turmoil. All I can say for sure is, MY POOR HUSBAND...Now that is an Angel worth hanging on to. Any man who can put up with a raging Hormonal woman deserves an award.
We both came from families with many children. You know the average among 3 or 4. So, in good conscious, we have decided to have 4 for ourselves. Unfortunately and Fortunately, we decided to have them very close together. We adore and love our children, but Man there really needs to be a book out there on how to get past some obstacles. It's like everyone goes through these little problems and big problems and Not one person wants to give out the secret on how to deal with the tantrums, the crying, the fighting, or what have you. They just want to see how you deal with it yourself and determine what type of parent you are or will be. Unless of course you may be a stubborn one and just ignore the little Angel advice being whispered in your ears or flat out thrown right at you so you can trip on the great advice. Some advice I listened to, some I just flat out ignored, and some just contradicted each other.
The main thing I have determined is By Golly the advice itself is more of a hassle than a help at some time, especially for new parents. It is hard enough stressing every minute of the day if your newborn is okay, well feed, sleeping well, will he/she be okay if I sleep, or should I hold them all night just so I can sleep? Who really needs all the stress of one person throwing out there that they never did this, you are doing it wrong, or that's an odd way of doing that...That to me had been the worst part of raising children. After our second child was born, I began to relax and found it was actually joyful having more children and not as stressful as people have said.
The only regret I had was I had to return to work two weeks after having our second child. I believe the stress of that lost time between my newborn and our financial situation put a huge strain on our marriage. Thank the Heavens above I have the husband I have or else we would have been through. Sure, he put more strain on me and I as well onto him, but it was a mutual problem. No One person is to be fully blamed for a marriage going sour, it is a joint problem just a marriage is a joint decision.
We have had our trying times, our calling it quits, our separations, and yes even a file for divorce. Something in us never gave up though. For one reason or another, we fought that deep dark sea of despair, the I do this you don't do that, I'm better at this than you ever could be...I tell you One important lesson...or tip what have you....STOP WITH THE BLAME GAME!!! It only hurts the marriage more and is a battle that will never be won.
With our third child came the realization I could not bare to lose any more time with my children. I left the work force and my husband had a job lined up. Sure, it has been a huge struggle and I admit...I really wonder if I'm a good enough parent. Some nights I go to bed thinking God I wish I didn't say that or do that. I wish I handled that better, but the only way I can think of a better solution is to say....Tomorrow is another day and you can start anew. You need to give yourself a break. Times are tricky, children can be tricky and yes even marriage can be just a tricky. Live for the moment and try with all your might to handle the situation at hand as best as you can. Then when you head to bed, you can go with a happy heart and know you did do the best you can. You never know what will happen each day and you wouldn't want the last words, thoughts, or emotions being negative. I know that's a tall order to fill and I tell you something, I struggle EVERY day, hour, minute and even second with this challenge.
On to the most devastating of all, Loss. It's hard to lose someone or something you have loved. It almost seems so surreal until you are face to face with your loved one's death. I had my first exposure to this as a teenager when I lost my Grandfather. I wasn't there when it happened, I saw my mother crying and I just couldn't figure out How I felt. The night I actually saw my Grandfather is the day I first understood loss. I couldn't believe the man I saw, who was always so strong, loving, and wonderful, could be there in a box and would never hug me again. I balled like a baby and vowed I would never in a million years let myself feel this way.....
Well, That's one vow I broke. I had gotten my first dog while still in high school and raised him for 11 years. Until Cancer took him from me. That was just as painful as losing my Grandfather. My dog, which turned out to be my husband and my First child. Our oldest child was around him the most and our second child was only a few months old when we lost him.It seems to me that long ago vow was made in vain way back then. You can live your life like you want, experience it grab it by the horns and tackle every battle regardless of the pain or joy. Or, you can tuck your heart away and just hide it from the world never exposing it to the joys of marriage or raising children. Why throw away the greatest gift given to you by just rolling over and letting the pain pass by you in waves. GET UP and fight for what's yours. Your life, Your Love and yes, even your loss. You will see each one will Make you who you are and even who you are meant to be.
So that said, Strap on the gloves, Pull back your hair, and Fight for all it's worth. After all, It is your life isn't it???
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
My Poor Baby!!!
Has Anyone Had This Experience?
A virus passed through my family like bees on honey!!! My oldest son was TERRIFIED...He had no idea what was wrong. He knew he felt awful and could not understand what was happening to him. I tried to soothe him, comfort him, hold him, basically ANYTHING I could to help him get through this AWFUL experience.
I was up working on the computer Late Thursday night into Friday morning, when my husband ran for the bathroom. He began getting sick. Once he was done, I went in to the bedroom with him and began rubbing his back. I told him I was going to go to the bathroom and shut down the computer when my oldest son began crying for me.... I went into his room expecting to put him back to bed, as he tends to wake up once in awhile and just want to be tucked in. He began to get sick. He tried to hold it back, but there was no stopping it. My poor baby started to cry. I grabbed him, hugged him to me, and ran to the bathroom. I sat in the bath tub and just held him, telling him he was okay, Mommy was here. Just let it out. You'll feel better soon. THEN, my husband was back up getting sick. I called 911, not because I was a panicky individual Terrified it was the Swine Flu, I just knew something was wrong. I told the operator what was happening and what symptoms I was having. I hadn't even thought of myself until he asked. I was feeling nausea all day and I had a terrible headache. I just chalked it up to my wonderful Monthly friend that just finished visiting. I was told to take everyone out of the house in case it was Carbon Monoxide. I ran to the front door and back door, throw open both, I bundled up my infant, wrapped my two toddlers up in blankets, had my husband by the door, and when we went to get out of the house when the paramedics came up and began getting us out of the house. They tested all the apartments to make sure it was not Carbon Monoxide and it came back negative. They transported my husband and my children to the hospital. My husband and my oldest son continued to get sick waiting for the okay and on the way to the hospital. I was to follow up in our car as I was okay enough to drive. We needed to get home afterward. I was told to bring clothes and what the children needed. I was so nervous, I left the ambulance, headed for the apartment then forgetting what I was suppose to do, I ran down to our car. It took me a bit to get out of our parking lot. I headed up to the hospital. I didn't realize I was speeding until I caught up to the Ambulance....I just kept singing the song that comforted my son. The alphabet song from Super Why. It calmed me down. I fought of the nausea, focused on my family. We all checked out okay and were able to go home at noon Friday. I was given some medication to help with my headache and nauseau which knocked me out. My husband drove us all home.
We spent the WHOLE weekend resting and I was in charge of running the boys into the bathroom each time they got sick. My poor husband has a very weak stomach! I took them into the bathroom and shut the door. When they were all set, I would start the bath water. It seemed to be the only way to calm them down. They LOVE to play in the water. Filling up the cup with water and dumping it. I called my husband in once they were calm and I was sure there would be no mishaps while he was with them. Then the men would hang out together while Mommy cleaned any messes in the other room.
I too became sick, I was lucky it was only one time. I think I had to clear out my system and fast because I needed to take care of ALL my men!!! It's funny how woman are able to do what needs to be done once it affects our family!!! Once I was sure the boys were all set, I took my medicine and tried to get some rest. I would wake up from a dead sleep regardless if it was a drug induced sleep, and ran to get my child that was sick. I could not believe I could move that fast with a pounding headache and an achy body!!! I didn't even realize how bad I felt until after my child was cleaned, bed changed, tucked in, and had their back rubbed until they fell asleep. Once I got to lay down, it would hit me. All I can say is Thank God I have the Mommy instinct!!! It really helped our family get through this virus.
Believe it or not, my oldest child did not receive his first cold until he was 13 months old and this was the very first stomach virus to run through our family like this. My second child has not been so lucky. He was about 6 months when he got his first cold. My infant received his first cold when he was 4 months old. I know, I know, you are going to say that is what happens when you have older children. It still does not comfort me knowing my babies are sick. I worry so much and this just makes it worse. I don't want my babies to ever experience pain, sickness, or anything negative.....Parenthood is going to be tough on me because of this.
I will tell you some time later what I'd love to tell you right now, but I really do not want to jinx anyone. Especially, since my middle child still had a bellyache just recently. Once it's been a FULL week with no episodes, THEN and only then will I say what I've been wanting to say....actually, maybe I'll wait awhole month......Nah, I'll just never say it!!!! I'm very superstitious you know!!! Let's keep it at that and I'll just end this blog for now.
Please, share some of your experiences with me. I want to know what happens next, how you've dealt with such situations, and gain tips or advice to better help my family in the future....I'm begging you, Please leave a comment!!! Thank you!
Sincerely,
Kristie Pomposelli
Virtual Assistant
Hard Working Mom
HardWorkingMomE@gmail.com
A virus passed through my family like bees on honey!!! My oldest son was TERRIFIED...He had no idea what was wrong. He knew he felt awful and could not understand what was happening to him. I tried to soothe him, comfort him, hold him, basically ANYTHING I could to help him get through this AWFUL experience.
I was up working on the computer Late Thursday night into Friday morning, when my husband ran for the bathroom. He began getting sick. Once he was done, I went in to the bedroom with him and began rubbing his back. I told him I was going to go to the bathroom and shut down the computer when my oldest son began crying for me.... I went into his room expecting to put him back to bed, as he tends to wake up once in awhile and just want to be tucked in. He began to get sick. He tried to hold it back, but there was no stopping it. My poor baby started to cry. I grabbed him, hugged him to me, and ran to the bathroom. I sat in the bath tub and just held him, telling him he was okay, Mommy was here. Just let it out. You'll feel better soon. THEN, my husband was back up getting sick. I called 911, not because I was a panicky individual Terrified it was the Swine Flu, I just knew something was wrong. I told the operator what was happening and what symptoms I was having. I hadn't even thought of myself until he asked. I was feeling nausea all day and I had a terrible headache. I just chalked it up to my wonderful Monthly friend that just finished visiting. I was told to take everyone out of the house in case it was Carbon Monoxide. I ran to the front door and back door, throw open both, I bundled up my infant, wrapped my two toddlers up in blankets, had my husband by the door, and when we went to get out of the house when the paramedics came up and began getting us out of the house. They tested all the apartments to make sure it was not Carbon Monoxide and it came back negative. They transported my husband and my children to the hospital. My husband and my oldest son continued to get sick waiting for the okay and on the way to the hospital. I was to follow up in our car as I was okay enough to drive. We needed to get home afterward. I was told to bring clothes and what the children needed. I was so nervous, I left the ambulance, headed for the apartment then forgetting what I was suppose to do, I ran down to our car. It took me a bit to get out of our parking lot. I headed up to the hospital. I didn't realize I was speeding until I caught up to the Ambulance....I just kept singing the song that comforted my son. The alphabet song from Super Why. It calmed me down. I fought of the nausea, focused on my family. We all checked out okay and were able to go home at noon Friday. I was given some medication to help with my headache and nauseau which knocked me out. My husband drove us all home.
We spent the WHOLE weekend resting and I was in charge of running the boys into the bathroom each time they got sick. My poor husband has a very weak stomach! I took them into the bathroom and shut the door. When they were all set, I would start the bath water. It seemed to be the only way to calm them down. They LOVE to play in the water. Filling up the cup with water and dumping it. I called my husband in once they were calm and I was sure there would be no mishaps while he was with them. Then the men would hang out together while Mommy cleaned any messes in the other room.
I too became sick, I was lucky it was only one time. I think I had to clear out my system and fast because I needed to take care of ALL my men!!! It's funny how woman are able to do what needs to be done once it affects our family!!! Once I was sure the boys were all set, I took my medicine and tried to get some rest. I would wake up from a dead sleep regardless if it was a drug induced sleep, and ran to get my child that was sick. I could not believe I could move that fast with a pounding headache and an achy body!!! I didn't even realize how bad I felt until after my child was cleaned, bed changed, tucked in, and had their back rubbed until they fell asleep. Once I got to lay down, it would hit me. All I can say is Thank God I have the Mommy instinct!!! It really helped our family get through this virus.
Believe it or not, my oldest child did not receive his first cold until he was 13 months old and this was the very first stomach virus to run through our family like this. My second child has not been so lucky. He was about 6 months when he got his first cold. My infant received his first cold when he was 4 months old. I know, I know, you are going to say that is what happens when you have older children. It still does not comfort me knowing my babies are sick. I worry so much and this just makes it worse. I don't want my babies to ever experience pain, sickness, or anything negative.....Parenthood is going to be tough on me because of this.
I will tell you some time later what I'd love to tell you right now, but I really do not want to jinx anyone. Especially, since my middle child still had a bellyache just recently. Once it's been a FULL week with no episodes, THEN and only then will I say what I've been wanting to say....actually, maybe I'll wait awhole month......Nah, I'll just never say it!!!! I'm very superstitious you know!!! Let's keep it at that and I'll just end this blog for now.
Please, share some of your experiences with me. I want to know what happens next, how you've dealt with such situations, and gain tips or advice to better help my family in the future....I'm begging you, Please leave a comment!!! Thank you!
Sincerely,
Kristie Pomposelli
Virtual Assistant
Hard Working Mom
HardWorkingMomE@gmail.com
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Are Homemaker's Capable Of Working?
Are Homemaker's Capable Of Working?
You are venturing out into the work force, researching the available jobs, hitting the pavement, and filling out those applications. The interviews follow with the same tedious questions that make you wonder, 'just how difficult do they think their job is? Have they EVER raised children?' Yes, the interview will contain the same mundane questions that have you laughing inwardly. Are you able to multi-task? How are you under pressure? Are you Bilingual? Do you handle confrontations well? How would you rate your negotiation skills? How would you handle angry clients?
Are you able to multi-task, why yes, I am able to multi-task....On a given hour, I can have a load of laundry started, children feed, washed, diaper change, dressed, read to until asleep then proceeding to feed a third child while answering emails.
How are you under pressure? Maybe they should start wording this as stress instead of pressure. The inevitable situations when you have JUST gotten the children washed, dressed and turn for one second and they are half naked, playing in ketchup and you have only two minutes to spare before they need to get on the school bus. Panic, HA I laugh at the word....Oh no, there is no such word...I prefer to think this question should actually be, 'How are you at adjusting to change?' Quickly a plan evolves in your head and is executed within seconds. New clothes in hand children under the arms, marathon run to the car, strapped in, back out of driveway BEFORE the school bus can even flash it's caution lights, drive to the school, redress the children, straighten out hair, and calmly walk into the school just as the bus approaches.....Ah, now that is what I call adjustment and determination!!!
Are you Bilingual? Well, let's put it this way, anyone who can have a conversation with an infant and two toddlers throughout a day and be able to hold an adult conversation should be considered Bilingual. That's is switching from one language, baby google, half spoken English language of the 3 year old and the 2 year old one word conversations. Then moving on to the world news, politics, and how your day went. Occasionally, those bilingual languages pop in and out of a conversation, so you must be able to hold three to four conversations at one time. Shouldn't this be considered a skill???
Do you handle confrontations well? Let's see...I have been able to successfully distract the angry screams of a toddler that just has to have that chocolate bunny so conveniently placed at his level right before lunch. How you may ask? Yelling back? Ignoring this behavior? Laughing the problem away? Oh yeah you can see just as well as I can how well these options would pan out. Just for kicks, let’s see what it would look like shall we? Yelling back, now that's classic. How would you look yelling at a three year old that just does not understand WHY he can't have what he wants? Are you going to yell at that employee to move out of your spot? Would you keep yelling and yelling till one just gives up. Of course not, how silly. Ignoring this behavior, yeah, that will really make it go away. It could even escalate to a tantrum on the floor. It will always come back and continue to bring you that anxiety JUST knowing it will happen again and it's only a matter of time. Laughing the problem away, hmm not too good as well. I'm sure the patrons at the store and the staff would think 'Boy this lady is crazy and the child is a brat!!' Laughing it off only instigates the situation and let's them know you are not to be taken seriously and you don't take them seriously. Once again this will to re-occur until you can actually take care of the problem appropriately. The best thing to do, take the child aside, maybe to the car, wait for the situation and each other have settled down, then explain to the child how they can not act that way. NEVER would you want to hurt your child or encourage this behavior, You begin to handle these situations coming in knowing what will happen, how you can avoid the problem and if you can't make that negotiation that will appease both sides.
How would you handle angry clients? I would handle them the same way as I would negotiate with them. Take a second to step back, assess the situation and keep an open mind upon hearing each side. Every situation can be handled in a calm, respectable manner. No one needs to walk away from a situation feeling as if nothing was accomplished or the problem was never fixed. Treat everyone with respect and you will be respected. This is a skill learned by parents and used all to well.Ah, interview over, hand shake given, with the promise of a call back. You realize it went well and are positive you will get the job. There is no way you are not qualified for this job. In fact, you may be OVER qualified for the job. If only he could see that this job is nothing compared to being a Homemaker.
Lion Tamer, you try telling me I can't do it!!!!
Kristie Pomposelli
Virtual Assistant
Hard Working Mom
HardWorkingMomE@gmail.com
http://www.HardWorkingMom.org
You are venturing out into the work force, researching the available jobs, hitting the pavement, and filling out those applications. The interviews follow with the same tedious questions that make you wonder, 'just how difficult do they think their job is? Have they EVER raised children?' Yes, the interview will contain the same mundane questions that have you laughing inwardly. Are you able to multi-task? How are you under pressure? Are you Bilingual? Do you handle confrontations well? How would you rate your negotiation skills? How would you handle angry clients?
Are you able to multi-task, why yes, I am able to multi-task....On a given hour, I can have a load of laundry started, children feed, washed, diaper change, dressed, read to until asleep then proceeding to feed a third child while answering emails.
How are you under pressure? Maybe they should start wording this as stress instead of pressure. The inevitable situations when you have JUST gotten the children washed, dressed and turn for one second and they are half naked, playing in ketchup and you have only two minutes to spare before they need to get on the school bus. Panic, HA I laugh at the word....Oh no, there is no such word...I prefer to think this question should actually be, 'How are you at adjusting to change?' Quickly a plan evolves in your head and is executed within seconds. New clothes in hand children under the arms, marathon run to the car, strapped in, back out of driveway BEFORE the school bus can even flash it's caution lights, drive to the school, redress the children, straighten out hair, and calmly walk into the school just as the bus approaches.....Ah, now that is what I call adjustment and determination!!!
Are you Bilingual? Well, let's put it this way, anyone who can have a conversation with an infant and two toddlers throughout a day and be able to hold an adult conversation should be considered Bilingual. That's is switching from one language, baby google, half spoken English language of the 3 year old and the 2 year old one word conversations. Then moving on to the world news, politics, and how your day went. Occasionally, those bilingual languages pop in and out of a conversation, so you must be able to hold three to four conversations at one time. Shouldn't this be considered a skill???
Do you handle confrontations well? Let's see...I have been able to successfully distract the angry screams of a toddler that just has to have that chocolate bunny so conveniently placed at his level right before lunch. How you may ask? Yelling back? Ignoring this behavior? Laughing the problem away? Oh yeah you can see just as well as I can how well these options would pan out. Just for kicks, let’s see what it would look like shall we? Yelling back, now that's classic. How would you look yelling at a three year old that just does not understand WHY he can't have what he wants? Are you going to yell at that employee to move out of your spot? Would you keep yelling and yelling till one just gives up. Of course not, how silly. Ignoring this behavior, yeah, that will really make it go away. It could even escalate to a tantrum on the floor. It will always come back and continue to bring you that anxiety JUST knowing it will happen again and it's only a matter of time. Laughing the problem away, hmm not too good as well. I'm sure the patrons at the store and the staff would think 'Boy this lady is crazy and the child is a brat!!' Laughing it off only instigates the situation and let's them know you are not to be taken seriously and you don't take them seriously. Once again this will to re-occur until you can actually take care of the problem appropriately. The best thing to do, take the child aside, maybe to the car, wait for the situation and each other have settled down, then explain to the child how they can not act that way. NEVER would you want to hurt your child or encourage this behavior, You begin to handle these situations coming in knowing what will happen, how you can avoid the problem and if you can't make that negotiation that will appease both sides.
How would you handle angry clients? I would handle them the same way as I would negotiate with them. Take a second to step back, assess the situation and keep an open mind upon hearing each side. Every situation can be handled in a calm, respectable manner. No one needs to walk away from a situation feeling as if nothing was accomplished or the problem was never fixed. Treat everyone with respect and you will be respected. This is a skill learned by parents and used all to well.Ah, interview over, hand shake given, with the promise of a call back. You realize it went well and are positive you will get the job. There is no way you are not qualified for this job. In fact, you may be OVER qualified for the job. If only he could see that this job is nothing compared to being a Homemaker.
Lion Tamer, you try telling me I can't do it!!!!
Kristie Pomposelli
Virtual Assistant
Hard Working Mom
HardWorkingMomE@gmail.com
http://www.HardWorkingMom.org
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Hard Working Mom - Virtual Assistant
Hard Working Mom Will Help With The Forgotten Tasks
I offer assistance to businesses and companies that have become too busy to perform the simple tasks. I'm available from Sunrise to Sunset. I have over 18 years experience in the Administrative field. Currently, I've become a Stay-At-Home Mom looking to fill my spare time by performing data entry, typing, general office skills, and assistance in Social Online Networks, manage emails, and so much more!!! If you have a list that has been bothering you for the longest time, contact me! Let's see how many jobs I can help cross off that pesky list. I will supply a quote in regards to the tasks needed from me. When you contact me, please be specific in what tasks you require so I may properly submit a reasonable quote. Upon approval of said quote, your job will be completed in the time frame approved of and an invoice will be submitted through Pay Pal. Other forms of payment can be arranged with potential clients. I hope to hear from you soon.
HardWorkingMomE@gmail.com
Coming in June:
http://www.HardWorkingMom.org
I offer assistance to businesses and companies that have become too busy to perform the simple tasks. I'm available from Sunrise to Sunset. I have over 18 years experience in the Administrative field. Currently, I've become a Stay-At-Home Mom looking to fill my spare time by performing data entry, typing, general office skills, and assistance in Social Online Networks, manage emails, and so much more!!! If you have a list that has been bothering you for the longest time, contact me! Let's see how many jobs I can help cross off that pesky list. I will supply a quote in regards to the tasks needed from me. When you contact me, please be specific in what tasks you require so I may properly submit a reasonable quote. Upon approval of said quote, your job will be completed in the time frame approved of and an invoice will be submitted through Pay Pal. Other forms of payment can be arranged with potential clients. I hope to hear from you soon.
HardWorkingMomE@gmail.com
Coming in June:
http://www.HardWorkingMom.org
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